What It's Like to Get Celeb Treatment at the Four Seasons Napa Valley

You've likely heard of the Four Seasons - yes, the ultra-luxe hotel brand that inspired and served as the backdrop of three seasons of "The White Lotus" - and Napa Valley, California's wine country. But when those two bastions of luxury converge? Now that's the stuff of dreams.

For Valentine's Day weekend, my partner and I got the opportunity to go on a two-night hosted stay at the Four Seasons Resort and Residences Napa Valley, and the experience somehow surpassed the expectations I'd had in my mind. But I suppose I shouldn't have been surprised; countless celebrities have been known to frequent the Four Seasons, and this relatively newer property (it opened in 2021) made headlines in 2025 when Eagles quarterback Jalen Hurts and Bry Burrows rented it out for their wedding weekend.

To perhaps a lesser extent than Hurts and Brown, my partner, Nicholas, and I had a Valentine's weekend at the property that was unbelievably romantic. Think: sparkling rosé upon arrival, a soak-in tub in a very sexily outfitted bathroom, and impeccable service that made us feel like royalty. It was immediately clear to me why the rich and famous choose the Four Seasons again and again. Here's a little peek inside.

About the the Four Seasons Napa Valley

• The property has 85 rooms and suites and 20 private residences. Rooms include indoor fireplaces, deep soaking tubs, private terraces, and wine fridges.
• There are two outdoor pools, one that's adults-only and another that's family-friendly.
• Dining options include Auro, a Michelin-starred restaurant; Truss, an all-day restaurant; and Campo for poolside eats and drinks. There's also a working vineyard and Elusa Winery tasting room on-site.
• Spa Talisa offers services like massages, facials, and mud baths.
• There's an on-site fitness center and bocce ball court, and the property offers complimentary yoga classes, bicycles, and more.

What I Liked About the Four Seasons Napa Valley

If you don't know much about Napa Valley, take it from someone who grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area and knows the area well: Calistoga, where the Four Seasons is located, is gorgeous and unique. It's a bit more rustic and private than other, more touristy wine spots like Napa, and it's known for its natural hot springs.

The property itself embodies the private, luxe feeling of the entire surrounding area. The guest rooms are actually their own townhomes: we had our own balcony, a spacious living area, two bathrooms, and a gorgeous bedroom that overlooked the mountains. The bathroom was my favorite aspect of our not-so-humble abode: it had stunning side-by-side vanities and a huge, soak-in tub with a separate shower - so spacious that I joked that my entire apartment could fit inside it.

Throughout the weekend, we were surprised at how quiet the grounds felt, and figured that most folks were just spending time in their own townhomes, given that everything you need for a relaxing weekend is at hand there, from a switch-on fireplace to one of the comfiest king beds I've ever experienced. The discreet nature of the place made it clear, again, why celebrities love it here.

And just like you'd imagine any talent-ready getaway to be, service at the Four Seasons is impeccable. For one, our room was equipped with an iPad where we could chat with hotel employees at all hours of the day, requesting anything we might need (my partner opted for memory foam instead of a feather pillow, for example). Hotel staff were always at the ready to drive us around the grounds on their golf carts, and the staff at the Spa Talisa went above and beyond - we had a nap-inducing couples' massage on our last day on the property.

The hotel also did an amazing job of planning an unforgettable itinerary outside the grounds. Of course, the main draw of a trip to Napa is generally what the area is known for: wine tasting. The Four Seasons scheduled an exclusive, food-pairing wine tasting for us at Darioush, an upscale winery, and the experience was one of the highlights of our entire weekend. The concierge even organized a designated driver to drive us to and from the property, which let us enjoy the day worry-free.

As for dining on property, we ate at Truss, an American restaurant, several times during our stay. We loved how varied the dining experience was: we ordered delicious breakfasts directly to our room, where we could graze leisurely; experienced a fireside chalet dinner one night, replete with comforting bites like artichoke dip and short rib; and sat inside the modern, design-y restaurant for a three-course Valentine's Day dinner.

Is the Four Seasons Napa Valley Worth the Splurge?

If you want to celebrate a big event in wine country - a special birthday, an engagement, something of the like - then I can't imagine a more fitting place for the occasion. Napa Valley is known for its upscale and gorgeous hotels, but the Four Seasons truly offers a one-of-a-kind, unforgettable experience that will leave you feeling like you got the celeb treatment.

I feel lucky to have gotten to experience it, as it certainly wasn't our run-of-the-mill weekend trip. To get to commemorate our love with the most beautiful backdrop? There's nothing better.

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Lena Felton (she/her) is a senior director of special projects at PS, where she oversees sponsored packages, tentpole projects, and editorial partnerships. Previously, she was an editor at The Washington Post, where she led a team covering issues of gender and identity. She has been working in journalism since 2017, during which time her focus has been feature writing and editing and elevating historically underrepresented voices. Lena has worked for The Atlantic, InStyle, So It Goes, and more.

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A "Micro-cation" Is the Bright Spot You Deserve This Winter

After the rush of the holidays dies down, a tough stretch of winter settles in. All that excitement from merriment and travel no longer masks the reality of short days and cold nights.

OK, I know I shouldn't be complaining about winter in San Francisco, where I live - we rarely endure a day below 50 degrees, and we don't have to deal with snowstorms. But there's still something about the winter mindset, the overall mood, that can get me down. The summer promises possibility, adventure, travel. And the winter, post-holidays, just promises . . . gritting your teeth and getting through it.

But this year, I tried something new to combat that gloom: a "micro-cation." Typically seen as a trip that's fewer than four days, micro-cations can be a low-commitment way to break up the monotony of winter, spark joy, and even reset your wellness.

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Experts Featured in This Article

Kaitlyn Rosati is a solo travel expert and author of No Man Nomad.

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As Kaitlyn Rosati, a travel expert and blogger, puts it: "A micro-cation, whether somewhere as far as a jump across the pond to Europe or finally visiting that small log cabin you've had saved on Airbnb that's a two-hour drive away, is a great way to experience something new and get a nice change of scenery. . . . One of the biggest excuses people have is that they don't have 'time' to travel. But for me, I'd rather spend three days in Italy than three days at home."

My Experience Taking a Wellness-Focused "Micro-cation"

While I'd gladly take any chance to visit Italy, part of why I love living in California is that there's so much to explore. Whether you're romping around a major city like Los Angeles or soaking up nature in a place like Yosemite, some of the world's best sights are right at our fingertips. Santa Barbara might be lesser-known, but it's a gorgeous, quintessentially Californian destination - a perfect place to take my wellness-focused micro-cation.

This micro-cation was truly small in scale (as they should be): just two nights and three days, in a city that is only about 300 miles from San Francisco. I'd only ever driven through Santa Barbara, a trip that can take upwards of five hours. This time, my partner and I opted to fly, which felt much less stressful. When we arrived in the palm tree-lined, sunny city after our short 45-minute flight, we were ready to spend the first afternoon exploring.

We immediately headed to our hotel, the Kimpton Canary, which is located in the heart of downtown Santa Barbara. Where you're staying is often the priciest part of any vacation, so I often look for deals and credit card points to reap travel benefits. For this micro-cation, my partner and I were hosted by Chase IHG One Rewards Consumer Credit Cards. During the trip, we learned just how far points can go: cardmembers earn IHG One Rewards on every purchase, and can use those points to unlock access to more than 6,800 hotels across IHG properties like the Kimpton Canary. As of Jan. 22, new Chase IHG One Premier and Traveler credit cardmembers who are approved have access to earning even more bonus points and perks.

We loved that the quaint, well-appointed hotel was so central; we walked directly out our door and into Santa Barbara's bustling downtown area, which is chock full of shops, restaurants, cafes. I was also immediately taken with the city's architecture: everything is Spanish-style and white-washed, the perfect setting for an escape. Its natural beauty is breathtaking, too, with long stretches of white beaches and grand mountains that jut up behind the city.

After meandering and getting into vacation mode, we met up with friends at one of their favorite wine bars, Lieu Dit, and then took a leisurely stroll down to the pier, watching the sun melt like sorbet into the Pacific Ocean. We had a casual, delicious dinner at Finch and Fork, the restaurant in the hotel, and went to bed early so we could make the most of our full day there.

And make the most of it we did. The next day was a mix of both adventure and relaxation - a perfect combo, in my opinion, for any micro-cation. We started the day off on the hotel rooftop, where we did an intimate, outdoor yoga class. Afterwards, I headed to Float Luxury Spa, about a five-minute walk from the hotel, for an indeed luxurious, 80-minute massage. After drifting off in bliss, I browsed the Santa Barbara Farmers Market, where stall after stall offered plump winter citrus, bright greens, and local honey. I love to feel like a local while traveling, and the bustling market was great for resident-watching, too.

Next, we borrowed bikes from the hotel and headed to Hendry's Beach, a slightly-farther-away locale. I will say, we were huffing and puffing up Santa Barbara's hills on the 30-minute bike ride, but we loved getting the chance to be active and see more of the city. We ate a sun-drenched lunch on the beach and then huffed and puffed back to our hotel, where we took a much-needed shower before ending the night at Loquita, a tapas restaurant our friends recommended. This is where insider knowledge and research come in handy: having one or two nice meals planned out really does make a micro-cation feel like an indulgence.

On Sunday, we did a quick jog along the beach before packing up, heading back to the airport, and getting home before dinnertime. It was a quick trip, yes, but I arrived back home feeling refreshed, at peace, and like I had really gotten out of my usual drab winter routine.

Takeaways For Planning a Micro-cation

The most important thing I learned about micro-cations is that choosing somewhere novel and enchanting - but not overwhelming - is key. While there were a handful of things my partner and I wanted to check out while we visited Santa Barbara, nothing felt absolutely pressing, and we left enough time in our itinerary to wander around and really just relax. That was the whole point, after all.

Where you stay is also crucial: Kimpton Canary ended up being the perfect landing spot for us, as it was within walking or biking distance to most of what we wanted to see. And a balance of relaxation and exploration will make your days feel fuller. I'd recommend prioritizing one or two "big" activities per day that allow you to really get a feel for the place or try something new.

I will say, Santa Barbara is a paradise in the winter simply because it is 70 degrees, sunny, and beautiful. But even if you're taking a micro-cation in a colder climate, think about what you can get out of the travel that you don't currently have at home. Maybe you try a new winter activity (cross-country skiing, for example, is pretty easy to pick up as a beginner), or maybe you spend the whole weekend holed up in a cozy cabin with a book.

Rosati says during this time of year, she enjoys visiting small towns in upstate New York, "despite the frigid temperatures." That's also because, she adds, "one of the biggest logistical benefits of choosing to visit places in January is you can usually get better hotel deals since it's low season for a lot of places."

"Outside of that," she continues, "you'd be surprised by how much you can see in a two- or three-day trip, and for me, it's quite literally a break from burnout."

Agree: micro-cations are all about giving you a little reprieve from it all.

Related:

I Tried "Hotel Hopping," the New Travel Trend That's Both Fun and Annoying

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Lena Felton (she/her) is a senior director of special projects at PS, where she oversees sponsored packages, tentpole projects, and editorial partnerships. Previously, she was an editor at The Washington Post, where she led a team covering issues of gender and identity. She has been working in journalism since 2017, during which time her focus has been feature writing and editing and elevating historically underrepresented voices. Lena has worked for The Atlantic, InStyle, So It Goes, and more.

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I Attended a Palm Springs Award Gala - and Brushed Elbows With Miley Cyrus

Over the years - having sat at my computer for many an award show, covering the news as it has unfolded - I've developed a curiosity to know what it's actually like to attend one. Our readers are interested, too: we've answered all your questions about what the stars are eating during shows, what's in the gift bags, and more.

Now that award season is in full swing, I'm excited to report that I have some insight for all of you. On Jan. 3, I got the opportunity to attend the Palm Springs International Film Awards, a night that honors this year's standout films. It's seen as a kickoff to award season, and I attended the show and after party as a guest, brushing elbows with the likes of Miley Cyrus and Adam Sandler.

Yes, I'm still pinching myself, but before we get to that, a little context. I was in Palm Springs thanks to a trip sponsored by Visit Palm Springs, the city's tourism organization. Palm Springs sits in the Coachella Valley, its beautiful desert landscape hugged by the spectacular San Jacinto Mountains. It's known for many things: world-class midcentury modern architecture, its queer-friendly social scene, its proximity to national parks like Joshua Tree.

And, seeing as it's a two-hour drive from Los Angeles, it's been a haven for Hollywood stars since the 1920s. You can tour Frank Sinatra's old home, and today's celebs still flock there for relaxing (and sometimes rowdy) getaways. In other words, it's the perfect backdrop to a major gala dinner like the one the Palm Springs International Film Festival puts on.

PS Photography | Lena Felton

What It Was Like to Attend an Award Gala

I'd been to Palm Springs a few times prior for bachelorettes and birthday parties, our trips a combination of hiking, relaxing by the pool, and spending balmy nights doing karaoke in downtown Palm Springs. This time, however, was a little different, seeing as we were given the A-list treatment. We were put up in the Renaissance Palm Springs Hotel, a massive property right in the heart of Palm Springs with views of those beautiful mountains. It's also just a block away from the Palm Springs Convention Center, which is where the gala has been held for more than 30 years.

On the day of the Film Awards, we kicked off our morning at Parker Palm Springs, a sprawling luxury hotel with 13 acres of exclusive property - a labyrinth of tucked-away pools, lemonade snack shacks, an intimate amphitheater, and more. It's a hot spot for high-profile guests, and you could feel it in the quiet, secluded grounds. We got massages at its nautical-themed spa, then had a lovely outdoor lunch on the racquet lawn. Those few hours, I'm sure, are exactly what the actual stars need to calm their nerves and get them into the right headspace for the flashing bulbs and stresses of an award show.

Indeed, before we knew it, it was time to stop relaxing and time to start prepping. Celebrities will spend hours getting glam ahead of award shows - their impeccable hair and makeup and nails and skin don't just materialize out of thin air. I opted to get my hair blown out at a nearby hair salon, but celebrities usually have a whole team of hair stylists, makeup and nail artists, and wardrobe stylists getting them glammed up. I did snag a couple products from our list of red carpet beauty products that are loved by celebrities, and did my own makeup at the hotel.

Before and after makeup (PS Photography | Lena Felton)

Around 4 p.m., it was time to meet up with our group to toast ahead of the awards, and everyone was dressed to the nines. It was a 60-degree evening in Palm Springs, and the sun was peeking behind the (rare) clouds. We weaved our way through an entrance for non-celebrities, which was next to the flashing lights of the star-studded red carpet, and voilá, we were inside the Convention Center. It was decked out in hundreds of beautifully adorned dinner tables and a massive, sparkling stage; there was even an ice luge at one of the walk-up bars.

The stars waltzed into the convention center right before the ceremony's start at 6 p.m., shuffling past crowds of adoring attendees. I hung out at the end of the tunnel, where some stars were peeling off to find their seats. And it was there that Cyrus did, in fact, brush past me as she entered the reception area, looking extra cool in sunglasses and a plunging tux. She was at the gala to accept her Outstanding Artistic Achievement Award for "Dream as One," her song in "Avatar: Fire and Ash."

I didn't have much time to fangirl, as it was time to take our seats. Most of the celebrities were seated in the center line of tables, the dazzling stars spread out among the 2,500 other guests (and, yes, they got shy glances from surrounding fans). Timothée Chalamet and Kylie Jenner canoodled at one table, just 24 hours before he famously went acceptance-speech official with her at the Critics Choice Awards. Our table was only about 50 feet from Adam Sandler's, where he and Laura Dern were cracking each other up. As the show started, we were treated to a three-course meal: a pumpkin-spiced pear salad to start, short ribs and mashed potatoes as a main, and a choice between poached pear and chocolate mousse for dessert, plus free-flowing drinks. Our tables were adorned with little glass buddhas, a keepsake guests are encouraged to take - if they can fit them in their fancy clutches.

L: Jenner and Chalamet sit at the gala dinner (Getty | Emma McIntyre) R: My place setting for the gala dinner (PS Photography | Lena Felton)

This award show is always special, too, because all the celebrities who win are notified beforehand - and are presented with their awards by another star. For example, Colman Domingo introduced Michael B. Jordan for his Icon Award win; Jane Fonda introduced Chloé Zhao, Paul Mescal, and Jessie Buckley, who were being honored for their work on "Hamnet." It felt like a friendly, intimate warm-up to all the competition to come, a chance to really celebrate before the rush of award season turned all the way up.

After three hours of dramatic, poignant, and funny acceptance speeches, it was time for the after party, which was held back at Parker Palm Springs, where we were earlier that day - though it felt like so much had happened since. Standing in line to get into the after party, Sandler and his wife and daughters were actually leaving the property, scooting past us with their roller suitcases. "Have fun, you guys," Sandler shouted over his shoulder.

L: Adam Sandler gives his acceptance speech after Laura Dern introduced him (Rand Larson) R: The large bread and charcuterie display at the Parker after party (PS Photography | Lena Felton)

The after party was reminiscent of a huge, boisterous, black-tie wedding: there was a dancing tent and multiple bar areas, with attendees milling about and grazing on a massive charcuterie display. Unfortunately, I didn't spot any celebrities in the crowd of hundreds, but I'm sure they were having a good time. Or maybe they were already back on the road to Los Angeles, saving up their energy for the rest of award season. They were just getting started, after all.

Well past midnight, I crawled back into my hotel room, my feet sore from four-inch heels. It was a night I won't forget, but I also wondered: how the heck do celebrities do this, over and over again, from January to March? I had newfound respect for their stamina and grace, and a newfound appreciation for watching award shows from my couch.

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Lena Felton (she/her) is a senior director of special projects at PS, where she oversees sponsored packages, tentpole projects, and editorial partnerships. Previously, she was an editor at The Washington Post, where she led a team covering issues of gender and identity. She has been working in journalism since 2017, during which time her focus has been feature writing and editing and elevating historically underrepresented voices. Lena has worked for The Atlantic, InStyle, So It Goes, and more.

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Going to London? Here’s What’s Worth Packing, Including an $8 Purse

I Travel for a Living-and This Backpack Is Still My Go-To After a Year

Backpacks endure a lot in their lifetime - getting dragged through trips, streets, trails, and gym locker rooms and crammed with way too much (sometimes wet, dirty, or stinky) stuff. And considering I've been living out of a carry-on suitcase and backpack for about two years now, I cannot understate the pressure that my backpack is under. My backpack is my bathroom medicine cabinet, my briefcase, my entertainment center, and my bookshelf. It's also my hiking backpack, my gym bag, my personal item, and my lunch bag. This thing has got to do it all - a seemingly impossible task for one bag.

Yet, somehow, I've found one that can take on the task: the Lululemon Wunderlust Backpack ($148).

I've had this Lululemon backpack for a little over a year now, and so far, it's been through 13 countries, more than 30 flights, and hikes in every type of weather, from the Arctic Circle in Norway to the "End of the World" in Tierra Del Fuego, Argentina. I've packed and unpacked it too many times to count.

So trust me when I say this backpack is the one. It can stand up to long hikes but also looks polished enough to take to the office. It can fit a hell of a lot of stuff yet still fits under an airplane seat (even when filled to the max). Its classic design means my husband doesn't mind carrying it for a while on long hikes (as you can see in the photos below). And even more importantly: it has a magnificent array of pockets.

If you are an avid traveler, have a lot of active hobbies, or just like a good backpack, keep reading for my take on why the Lululemon Wunderlust Backpack is simply the best.

What I Like About the Lululemon Wunderlust Backpack

Most travel backpacks fall into one of a couple of categories: the super-intense nomad backpacks that look like a veritable turtle shell, cutesy carry-ons that don't fit much and suffice for vacationers only, or super-crunchy outdoor-adventure backpacks that can stand up to multiday backpacking trips. I need something in between, and this backpack fits the bill.

At 25 liters of volume, it can fit a LOT of stuff. For reference, my typical backpack load includes two books, a small notebook, a laptop, a bag of chargers, a case of toiletries, a pouch of miscellaneous personal-care items, a water bottle, an extra jacket, hand sanitizer, sunglasses, and a spare wallet. And because the main compartment closes with a drawstring, you can really push the limits of the amount of stuff you can cram in. For instance, if the gate attendants are being strict about the "two items only" rule, I can still fit my little crossbody purse inside my backpack in a pinch. Because of the drawstring and the adjustable buckles, it can also adjust to smaller loads - so if you're packing light for a day trip, you can physically downsize it versus carry around a big empty shell of a bag.

The trolley-compatible sleeve in the back is beyond helpful for slipping onto the handle of my carry-on so I have the option of either carrying it on my back or rolling it around (a must have for a travel backpack, IMO). And there's a padded zipper laptop pocket that you can access from the side - not through the main compartment. Take it from someone who treats TSA like a competition: this is huge if you are trying to be fast in the security line and don't want to rearrange your whole backpack to take out your laptop. Because it's padded and water repellant, I've also never worried about something happening to my computer while it's inside.

While it's not designed to be a hiking backpack first and foremost, the Lululemon Wunderlust Backpack has a lot of the features you need to hit the trail, like a padded back panel and straps, two easy-access water-bottle pockets, and water-repellant fabric. I have thoroughly tested that last feature: after getting caught in a surprise downpour while on top of a mountain in Brasov, Romania, I was soaked - but everything inside my backpack was perfectly dry. After that, I've never been nervous about getting caught in bad weather with this thing on, and it protects my stuff every time. I've comfortably worn this in all-weather hikes, from rain and snow to sweltering heat, and it's held up through it all (and has yet to smell, either).

An unexpectedly useful feature on this backpack are the tiny pockets on the outsides of the water-bottle sleeves. They don't fit much, but they're the perfect size to fit a phone charger for easy access or even to store trash when you're on a hike (remember: leave no trace!).

As for the other pockets, there's a small one inside the back of the main compartment that's perfect for stashing a few extra cards or some cash. (In case you haven't heard this yet: always split up your sources of money, so if you lose your wallet or purse, you don't lose everything. I learned this one the hard way.) There's another small pocket on the top of the backpack that's the perfect size for things like hand sanitizer or keys, and I've found it to be a great spot for sunglasses since they get crushed and will be easy to access when you arrive to your destination. Finally, there's a front envelope-like pocket with a snap closure that's perfect for thinner items like a notebook, passport, or book or even for keeping dirty laundry or a wet swimsuit separate from everything else (speaking from experience).

And despite how heavy I pack this thing (I can't even tell you how many cab drivers, hotel porters, family members, and friends have commented), this backpack shows no sign of tearing on any of the zippers, seams, or straps.

What's Worth Noting About the Lululemon Wunderlust Backpack

One of the only drawbacks I've found in my extensive use of this backpack is that the water-bottle sleeves are quite small. A 16-oz. Corkcicle bottle or Swell bottle will fit inside, but my other favorite water bottles (such as this giant Yeti or popular Hydroflask) don't.

I also chose the Raw Linen colorway (which is no longer available), even though I knew it would get dirty. And it has, though not nearly as much as you might expect from all the travel and outdoor adventuring I've done with it. And that's truly lucky, because this thing is spot-clean only (another drawback).

Who the Lululemon Wunderlust Backpack Is Best For

While my personal needs are quite unique, I think this Lululemon backpack makes the perfect all-in-one backpack for anyone who likes to be active when they travel - someone who might need a backpack for a hike or day outside or even to hit the gym but doesn't want a backpack that screams "crunchy." You could equally use this backpack for day-to-day running around, especially if you need to change outfits a few times or bring a laptop or tablet with you.

Additional Details

• Color options: Black, Black/Silver.
• Dimensions: 14.2" x 6.1" x 20.1"
• Laptop pocket: Fits up to a 16" laptop. I can fit my 13-inch laptop inside with a thin sleeve case on it.

Where Is the Lululemon Wunderlust Backpack Available?

The Lululemon Wunderlust Backpack is available on lululemon.com.

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- Additional reporting by Haley Lyndes

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Lauren Mazzo was the senior fitness editor at PS. She is a certified personal trainer and fitness nutrition specialist through the American Council on Exercise. Prior to joining PS, she worked for six years as a writer and editor for Shape Magazine covering health, fitness, nutrition, mental health, sex and relationships, beauty, and astrology.

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Haley Lyndes is a shopping writer and editor with more than seven years of experience in the publishing space. Specializing in home and lifestyle, she covers everything from furniture and mattresses to beauty products and fitness gear. Her writing has appeared in BuzzFeed, Travel + Leisure, and Real Simple.

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Sober Dating May Help You Find Love More Easily - Here's What to Know

Sober dating (also known as dry dating) is the newest thing you've likely already seen mentioned on dating apps. As the name suggests, it's what happens when people date completely sober. Sure, it makes sense for people who can't or choose not to drink as a lifestyle, but for those of you who do enjoy the casual cocktail or glass of wine, especially to ease any nerves, shyness, or social anxiety, dating without the crutch of alcohol is a tough sell.

Interest in dry dating has been gaining steam for years, though. In 2022, Bumble linked it to a larger COVID-related shift, reporting that 25 percent of Americans said they drank less after the pandemic. "This shift has affected dating, with 34 percent of folks using the Bumble app saying that they're more likely to go on a 'dry date' now than pre-COVID," Bumble noted.

Therapist and dating coach Jessica Engle, LMFT, director of the Social Anxiety Support Center and Bay Area Dating Coach, agrees that the pandemic is the most likely cause behind the shift in drinking-while-dating habits. "We've had a lot of calls from people who [said], 'Look, I need to work on my dating life, because I realized that I want a life partner,'" she explains. "I think that people are, in some cases, getting more serious about finding their partner, and they want to do it in a way that is healthy and very clear-eyed."

Convinced? Not so convinced? We talked to Engle about the ins and outs of sober dating, how to know if it's right for you, and some anxiety-coping mechanisms that could replace your usual drinks.

Related:

Dua Lipa Shares How She Recharges Amid "Surreal" Return to Touring

What Is Sober Dating?

Coined as "dry dating," sober dating is dating without any type of substance (including drugs, alcohol, and more), Engle says. Since dating culture so often revolves around casually meeting up for drinks, you're not alone if the thought of dating sans alcohol feels daunting - especially if you've come to rely on alcohol to loosen up over an awkward first date. Despite all this, Engle says dry dating does offer some substantial benefits:

It allows you to be fully yourself and develop a genuine connection. Staying sober can help you keep a clear mind on a date. "You're really seeing the person across from you clearly," Engle says, and you are better able to judge how deep your connection really is. "If we have a substance in our systems, we're not our perhaps truest self," she explains. "We don't actually get to use that experience to gauge whether we're a good fit with the other person." Staying sober might help you be more authentic.

Being honest and vulnerable about your nerves can actually make you more attractive. If you usually drink on or before a date to quiet your nerves, consider being honest about your feelings instead. It's possible those anxious feelings you want to numb could actually open the door to a deeper connection. Try saying something like, "Wow, I don't know about you, but I had some butterflies getting ready today," to break the ice and see how they respond.

You'll get better at dry dating over time. One of the main tenets of social-anxiety treatment, Engle says, is that "we have to give our nervous systems a chance to have an experience and process it sober, in order to get used to it." Adding a substance into the mix "buffers" the experience of the date and doesn't allow you to truly get used to the person or even the situation of being on a date. "If you're not giving yourself that sober space to ease in with [your date], it's hard to have a very strong foundation," Engle says.

All of this said, dry dating also comes with some challenges. For one, you may notice a lack of confidence, since drinking lowers our inhibitions and often makes us feel more sexy and self-assured. You might find that it's also awkward to explain why you're not drinking to your date. "That can be challenging for some people. It can feel like, 'Oh, I'm rocking the boat,'" Engle explains. But it's worth nothing that someone who hassles you for not drinking probably isn't worth the date anyway.

While these aren't necessarily meant to discourage you from sober dating, it's worth noting where you might have some difficulty so it won't feel like a surprise attack when some social anxiety pops up or an awkward situation arises.

Related:

10 LGBTQ+ Dating Apps to Download in 2025

Is Sober Dating For You?

As with most things surrounding dating, whether you drink or not is a personal choice. Given the benefits we talked about above, it's likely that most of us could benefit from a bit of dry dating, but it could be particularly helpful for people who are truly looking for their life partner, Engle says. "They're going to want to be as clear-eyed and mindful as possible on those dates to make sure that the alcohol is not making the person look more attractive or clouding their vision," she explains.

Of course, it's normal to feel a bit unsure about actually trying dry dating, especially if you tend to lean on alcohol or other substances to help you relax or relieve anxiety. Luckily, Engle says, "there are a lot of other ways to relax, and there are so many practices that can allow us to be present and grounded with another person." It might take more effort, she says, but "it does set us up for more relational success in the long run."

How to Not Be Nervous on a Date

Here are a few things you can do to calm your nerves if you decide to skip the drinks:

Take a deep breath to relax in the moment. "Deep breathing is one of the most powerful, most portable, most invisible tools we have for managing our state [of mind]," Engle says. Take one big deep breath to clear your mind, and try to exhale for a little longer than you inhale to really relax. You can also excuse yourself for a couple minutes or go to the bathroom if you need a longer reset period.

Exercise before your date to sweat out some stress. Pre-date exercise can help you work off some of your excess energy, which allows you to feel less nervous and calmer. Plus, that rush of endorphins can help you feel more positive - research has shown that even one 30-minute workout can improve body image, which might boost your confidence.

Start a meditation practice. Meditating before a date can be a great way to loosen up and calm down, but Engle also recommends starting a regular meditation practice. "Your nervous system, your brain starts to learn what it's like to go into that calm state when you want to," she explains.

Try therapy if your anxiety is preventing you from opening up. "If you're at the level where you can't think of things to say, you're completely freezing up, blanking, that's a level of social anxiety that I think is best to actually address with therapy," Engle says. "The truth is, if you are that shy or socially anxious at the beginning of the relationship, and that's not attended to, it's going to come up later in the relationship in some way." You might consider looking for a therapist who specializes in social anxiety, dating, relationships, or whatever specific needs you have.

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Can a Hotel Make or Break Your Marathon Experience? Here's My Take

What no one tells you about running a marathon is that it doesn't end at the finish line. It ends with the walk back to your transportation, home, or in my case, a hotel. After I crossed the finish line at the Chicago Marathon, all I could think about was how much I wanted to get back to my hotel. Sure, there was a post-race party, where the euphoria of a collective runner's high was sure to be contagious. But the sensory overload of running hours through the iconic neighborhoods of Chicago made me crave a quiet retreat.

I hobbled a half-mile to return to the Pendry Chicago. My legs felt heavy with each step, but my feet felt surprisingly good in my Nike Vomero Plus shoes. I reminded myself that my room was stocked with a couple of recovery devices to alleviate the impact of the 26.2 miles. As I entered the art deco lobby, I congratulated a few fellow marathoners. With each step into the hotel, the vibe got more calm. While training for a marathon, I frequently doubted my decisions. Was I following the right training plan? Was I fueling adequately? What would happen if I got injured? As I made my way up to the room and found my body starting to relax, I realized I'd made one great decision: staying at a wellness-focused hotel.

About Pendry Chicago

• This hotel has 364 newly redesigned rooms, including 81 suites.
• Nightly rates average $152.
• Onsite dining options include Venteux, which is a Parisian-inspired restaurant open for breakfast, lunch, and dinner; Bar Pendry, a classic hotel bar that offers small plates; and Château Carbide, a rooftop dining option available to guests 21 and older.
• Valet parking is $79+ tax per vehicle, per night.

What I Like About the Pendry Chicago

My goal as a runner is to complete all six of the Abbot World Major Marathons and be awarded a Six Star Medal. The Chicago Marathon was my third marathon on this journey. After traveling to Berlin and Boston to earn my stars, I realized that where you stay for a marathon sets the tone for an event that you've invested months of training in. With Chicago, I was determined to put my best foot forward, and the Pendry proved to be the perfect environment.

My first thoughts as I arrived at the Chicago airport and found myself packed into an overcrowded subway was that it was going to be an intense weekend: my many solo training runs were now culminating in an event that rivals a Taylor Swift concert in attendance.

But when I arrived at the Pendry Hotel, located in the Carbide and Carbon Building, it was busy but not overly crowded. Small groups were enjoying happy hour at Bar Pendry, and there were a few runners carrying their race kits. During marathon weekends, it's common for hotel lobbies to be as busy as an airport, so I was grateful that the Pendry felt spacious.

While the hotel is known for its iconic views, I requested a room on a low floor. When I ran the Boston Marathon, I stayed at a hotel with more than 1,000 rooms and endured wait times of more than 20 minutes for an elevator. Staying on a low floor allowed me the option to take the stairs, but I was put at ease when the elevators at the Pendry came promptly.

The room was modern, clean, and luxurious.The standout feature was the bed; it was a perfect balance of cozy and firm. I usually barely sleep leading up to a race, but I managed to capture a decent Oura ring sleep score this time around.

One of the pinnacle moments of running a marathon is the carb load dinner, where a carb-heavy meal will give you the extra fuel you need to complete a long-distance run. I opted for Venteux, the hotel's Parisian-style restaurant. I noshed on a warm baguette and primavera pasta. Both were exactly what I needed: carb-loaded without too much spice and fat. The restaurant also offered a few marathon promotions: 50 percent off food and beverage on race day for finishers and a free half dozen oysters for participants. As someone with a sensitive stomach, the offer of oysters before a marathon was terrifying, but I saw many runners indulging in them after the race.

When deciding on a hotel for a race, the proximity to the start line is the first criteria I look at. I wanted to get to the marathon at 6:20 a.m. to check in, so every minute of extra transit time would cost me sleep. The Pendry was about a 10-15 minute walk down Michigan Avenue and I got to see an epic sunrise as I made my way to Grant Park.

The energy of the marathon was electric. With 1.7 million spectators across 29 neighborhoods, it was a party from start to finish (though I did politely decline several exhuberant spectators' offers for Fireball shots). As I made my way to the finish line, my legs were fatigued. This was my third marathon in six months and it felt like my quads were fighting for their life. I tried my best to focus on the moment and not get sidetracked with worry that I may not be able to walk tomorrow.

Thankfully, the energy of the crowd got me to the finish line. After more than 26 miles of being surrounded by celebration, I was ready for some calm. After a slow-but-as-fast-I-could-move walk back to the hotel, I unwinded with a few items I'd rented from the Pendry's wellness menu, a selection of products designed to help with recovery, sleep, and relaxation. I started with the Therabody RecoveryAir JetBoots, which were better than having a massage. They combine compression therapy with vibration and infrared LED light for a truly restorative experience. They restored my legs and I was able to walk with reduced discomfort after using them. Next, I wrapped myself in a Higher Dose Infrared Sauna Blanket. After running, your body cools, and the warmth of the infrared was like a comforting hug.

What to Consider Before Booking the Pendry Chicago

There are a few considerations if you're looking at booking the Pendry. First off, because it's located on Michigan Avenue, the traffic and city noise can get loud, but my white noise machine drowned out the sounds well. If you're someone who lives in an urban environment, you may not be fazed by the noise.

Parking in Chicago is known for being costly, and the $79+ tax nightly for valet is pretty steep. But public transportation is easily accessible from the hotel.

Finally, while the Pendry Chicago does not have a spa, it has a partnership with Aire Ancient Bath, where guests receive priority booking and special perks for the spa experience. Aire is a spa featuring thermal baths, massages, and body treatment. I tried a 30-minute massage the day after the marathon and it helped melt away the lingering tension in my legs.

Who Is the Pendry Chicago Best For?

This is the perfect hotel for runners toeing the line at the Chicago Marathon. The proximity to the start line is unbeatable, and the calm environment will set them up for success. In general, the hotel is ideal for a trip to Chicago if you're seeking a balance of urban adventure with a touch of luxury.

Rating

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Genevieve Farrell Roston (she/her) is an award-winning filmmaker and the director of video at PS. She oversees the Webby-nominated PS Fit video series, which makes fitness fun and accessible. She has more than 10 years of experience in the entertainment industry. A certified personal trainer, she loves running, Pilates, and rest days. As a mom of two, she is an avid reviewer of children's gear and products.

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8 Romantasy Authors Share Their Best Real-Life Dating Advice

Romantasy has been having a major moment for a while now, and for good reason. In these books, enemies can become lovers in a matter of chapters, and "shadow daddies" can completely reframe our idea of the word "fantasy." And while many of us enjoy escaping into these books, the genre is also infiltrating our real lives: romantasy boyfriends are raising the bar on real-life partners, for example, and certain scenes are popularizing specific sex positions.

Yes, romantasy (and just straight romance) books have an outsized impact on culture. But right now, the dating scene is strange, with many swearing off dating apps and looking for love elsewhere. That's why we went straight to the source for real-life dating advice. From Carissa Broadbent - whose Crowns of Nyaxia series boasts a loyal following - to "Vicious Bonds"'s Shanora Williams, these romantasy and romance authors shared their best advice on dating, relationships, and love.

Take a leaf out of these authors' books - trust us, they know what they're writing about.

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The 2026 PS Reading Challenge Came Early This Year - Just in Time For Reading Season

Warning: "Bookfishing" May Be Plaguing Your Dating Apps

Most people would agree that reading is a hot-person hobby. Spot someone out in the wild with a book in hand, and they will probably appear more attractive, more intelligent, and more aware of the female gaze. (There's a reason why the Instagram account Hot Dudes Reading has a casual 1.3 million followers.)

Even people on dating apps agree: according to data sourced by Bumble, 66 percent of Gen Z and millennial singles say they would be more likely to swipe right on someone who mentions reading in their profile. The only problem? Not everyone's love for books is as genuine as it seems.

As I like to call it, "bookfishing" is what happens when someone pretends to love books or reading in an attempt to appear more dateable. Similarly to how someone may be labeled a catfish if they look nothing like their photos, your dating apps might be polluted with people pretending to be literary bookworms, too.

This was the case for Lizzy*, 30, when she matched with a man who included a photo of himself reading "Jane Eyre" in his profile. When Lizzy messaged him saying she needed to check out his attic before agreeing to go on a date, he responded with a series of question marks, clearly missing the Mr. Rochester reference. "I unmatched him. Did he even make it past the first chapter before deciding to snap a photo of himself reading?" she says.

"Did he even make it past the first chapter before deciding to snap a photo of himself reading?"

Alexis, 29, also remembers the time she encountered a bookfish. As a book lover herself, she was drawn to a man's profile who said his perfect Sunday involves reading a good book. When she asked him about his favorite authors and titles, she thought his response felt off (and possibly even generated by ChatGPT). However, she gave him the benefit of the doubt.

When they decided to meet up at a bookstore a week later, he admitted to not knowing as much about books as his profile implied. "He told me he wanted to get more into reading, which is great, but he acted like he was already into it on his profile," she says. "It honestly felt like a lie."

According to Tinder, mentions of "book boyfriend" increased 306 percent between 2023 and 2025, and mentions of "reading" in bios have also increased on average 184 percent year over year. Based on this data, reading has clearly become the hottest new dating flex. In one Reddit thread, a user even asked, "Would reading books that women like help you attract women?"

But unfortunately, the rise of books and reading has made it impossible to know who is bookfishing or not in their profile. So, how can you spot a bookfish? Though you may not be able to tell from your first few conversations online, switch to a phone call, FaceTime, or in-person date to discuss books.

If they can talk about books beyond surface level and share opinions on a storyline or how a book ended, it's probably a good sign they're not bookfishing you. But if the conversation revolves around common book classics they were probably forced to read in high school, then you'll have to decide how honest you think they are.

At the end of the day, no one should have to "prove" their love for reading to anyone - and if someone's favorite book really is "The Catcher in the Rye," then so be it. But if reading is important to you, don't settle for someone who just looks good holding a copy of "The Catcher in the Rye" in their profile. With a little bit of sleuthing and patience, you'll be able to find someone who actually makes it through the entire book without doing it for validation.

Though Alexis remains single, she says she would rather date someone who is honest about their reading habits than be with someone who pretends to read for more matches. "It's OK if books aren't both of our passions, but don't lie to me before we even go on a date," she says.

*Name has been changed

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Taylor Andrews is the senior balance editor at Popsugar, specializing in topics relating to sex, relationships, dating, sexual health, mental health, travel, and more. With eight years of editorial experience, Taylor has a strong background in content creation and storytelling. Prior to joining PS in 2021, she worked at Cosmopolitan.

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Popsugar's New Travel Line Is Here to Upgrade Your Airport Routine

Image Source: Popsugar

Traveling can be a real pain. Delayed flights, unpredictable TSA security measures, and jet lag are just a few reasons the trip of a lifetime can take a sour turn. One thing we do have control over, however, is our travel gear. Call it a desire for control amid the chaos or simply a love for the finer things, but we'll take any accessory that's stylish, functional, and makes life easier. Enter the new Popsugar travel accessories collection, available exclusively at Walmart.

Available now, the lineup features all the essentials that, once you have them, you'll wonder how you ever traveled without; that'll become as crucial to your next packing sesh as your carry-on luggage is for a quick trip and your noise-canceling headphones are for a long flight. At the top of my (slightly biased but well-traveled) lineup: the Popsugar Passport Holder ($18), that fits everything: your passport, ID, credit cards, Chase Sapphire Reserve membership (if you're as lounge-obsessed as I am - not sponsored, just a fan), and even cash, so you don't have to lug around a separate wallet.

Other standouts in the colorful collection include the Hanging Travel Toiletry Bag ($20), which lets you stash all your essentials in one place and hang it up with the built-in hook to save precious counter space (and, consequently, mental space when your setup looks less chaotic). While you're at it, you can fill it with the Travel Bottles Set ($16) - made of soft, squeezable silicone - perfect for anyone who prefers to bring their own products on the go. (I get it.) On the topic of staying organized, the Packing Cubes Set ($25) is just as covetable. It comes with large and medium cubes, plus a cosmetic bag and a drawstring laundry or shoe bag that can double as storage for just about anything.

In the rare case you're still with me and haven't skipped ahead to shop the products (no judgment, TBH), I'm rounding out this list with the less "sexy" travel essentials we zhuzhed up, because everything you own deserves to be as fun to look at as it is functional. Case in point: the Travel Pill Organizer ($12), complete with customizable labels you can mark by date, time, or both, depending on your needs. And let's not forget the TSA Locks ($22). which come in a set of two and are genuinely the prettiest ones I've ever seen.

And, according to the reviewers, I saved the best for last. The Travel Neck Pillow ($20) has already earned plenty of praise from Walmart shoppers, who call it "the BEST." It's made of bouncy, supportive memory foam and even has a washable cover - because when you're traveling, that feels essential, doesn't it? That, and everything on this list, TBH.

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Marisa Petrarca (she/her) is a contributing editor for PS Shopping and has over seven years of experience writing and editing beauty, fashion, and lifestyle content. She was previously the senior beauty editor at Grazia USA and the style and beauty editor at Us Weekly. Now freelancing, her work has been featured in Cosmopolitan, Allure, Marie Claire, and more.

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